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Friday, 11 February 2011

Morning

The morning never ceases to amaze me. On days that I can overcome my slothfulness and get out of bed at a decent hour I am most always rewarded. There's such unmatched tranquility to it as the nearby construction has yet to start it's symphony of warning beeps and percussive hammering. Add in the olfactory perfection that is the scent of brewed coffee and I begin to think 'Hey, I could get used to this'. My favorite of all is how bright the morning sun can be when it comes directly into the living room where I'm writing. With my dorm tucked away into a hollow in the back corner of campus, there is only a small amount of time that one gets to enjoy the direct sunlight. That time is now: in the early morning. There is peace here. There is quiet. But most spectacularly, I find God here. Right where He said He'd be: in the smallest, stillest parts of life. When I push out the world and make an effort to wake up and see Him, He's there.

Now that I've got some time with my creator, what do I SAY to the guy? What should I ask Him? For advice? A miracle? Wisdom? Strength?

I don't begin to know.

But in moments of greatest clarity I find myself very wary of asking anything at all! At my best, I realize the gravity of asking God for help because it's at these times when I'm very aware that I just might get it. It's so easy to ask God for strength, wisdom, or direction but what would I DO with it? Ben Parker, uncle of Spider-man, said it best: “With great power comes great responsibility.” Could I even handle the wisdom and blessings of Solomon? The drive and discernment of King David? How easy would it be to corrupt such precious gifts?

Still, I know God has a plan and a gift (maybe even many gifts) for me; Gifts I'm meant to grow strong enough to use. With all my inhibitions screaming in my ear, I clear my mind and begin to ask God for a little direction. Maybe a hint at what I can do for others? How do I go about identifying and honing my strengths for His sake? Is there some sort of Heavenly equivalent to to a Facebook “What's God's plan for YOU?!” quiz I can take to speed this along? Frustration can often set in when I get into such a reflective state. I begin to let my worries and fears snowball until I reach the conclusion that I'm foolish for even thinking such a dirty and broken creature as myself could have a significant purpose.

Then God comes right back in.

Once again that small, still voice pierces the turmoil of my heart to tell me that I AM broken. I AM sinful. I AM unworthy of the things He has planned. But above all that I am something more.

I am forgiven.

God will spend the rest of our lives breaking us and mending us as something better than we were before. But just because we will always be able to improve does NOT mean we aren't ready for the work He has for us now. When called to follow Christ, the disciples didn't sign up for a training course and 6 weeks later get a certificate qualifying them for God's kingdom. They CHOSE it. Freely and instantly. And in that instant they became new. And FROM that instant they began a lifelong process of ministry.

You know what my favorite thing to read about the disciples is? It's not when they go out to heal the sick, cast out demons or spread the gospel. Those are amazing, don't get me wrong, but they're not what I love most. What I love to read most about the disciples is when Jesus rebukes them for making a mistake. It brings indescribable comfort to see them mess up. Because even though Jesus corrects them (often harshly) in one verse, He's having dinner and fellowship with them four verses later. The forgiveness is instantaneous. It was for them. It is so for us.

We are new disciples. The next generation. Just as our spiritual forefathers, we WILL fail. We WILL fall short. And just as before, God WILL chastise us. He WILL break us for His names sake. But He WILL forgive us.

We are here to do the Lord's work.

Are we qualified? No. Are we called? Most definitely.

“No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love Him.”

--1 Corinthians 2:9

Wednesday, 22 December 2010

...From A Certain Point of View

There is very little time for boredom in a mall so long as the place is packed full of people. While my mom, sister or lady-friend race the circuit from rack to dressing room and back again, I creepily watch the unknowing public around me. At first it seems like chaos; just a bustled rush of individuals all going about their business. But with a little practice, you can begin to decipher basic characteristics about these individuals. Patience, Kindness, Self-Consciousness, Arrogance and many more begin to play out before you.

Occasionally, during my many accumulated hours of people-watching, I've found a fellow observer. We'll smile to one another, then continue our observing. I sometimes wonder how often I fall under the scrutinous eye of the people-watcher. What do they see when my actions play out before them? I believe myself to be a most curious specimen. I'd say I'm definitely clumsy and probably prone to idiosyncratic behavior. There is no doubt a plethora of weird little things I don't even realize I do. But after the initial amusement that would come from seeing me stumble about, what traits would emerge?

I thought about this while at work.I get alot of opportunities to watch customers and more often than not they frustrate me. But something occurred to me. Do any of them ever sit just outside the store on a bench and watch me work?

Would they see me get short with people? Pretend to choke someone while their back is turned? Walk right past a customer and pretend I'm on the phone to a person of importance just so I don't have to deal with whatever dumb question they have this time?

I've done it. Every single one of those. I'm not proud of it but it's happened. At this point the observer sees an irritable, uncaring employee who scorns the holidays. In just one lap around my store I can demolish any hope I have of someone seeing me for what I claim to be: Someone with joy, compassion and goodwill. Someone who has experienced a transforming of their mind and spirit. We all have bad days, yes. But these are not isolated incidents I'm talking about. This is a reoccurring habit of letting the worse points of view cloud my outlook. It takes effort (some days more than others) to make myself perk up and greet customers with acceptance and glad tidings but the rewards are worth it. Consider the following example:

An old woman wanders through the isles, stumbles really. Just looking from rack to rack, flipping cds and dvds, messing the whole place up. It's obvious she has no idea what shes looking for and will never find it. God, I wish she'd just give up and leave.

I recently experienced that thought process at work. After thinking it, I began to feel ashamed of myself. With a humbled heart, I approached the old woman. As I turns out, I was kind of right about the situation. She was looking for a particular song. She had no idea who sang it. She didn't even know if this person was someone whose music we might even carry. Yet there she was, searching. She explained to me that her husband was very good at guessing Christmas presents. Every year, it seemed, he could tell exactly what she was getting him. But this year was gonna be different. This year she was gonna slip this CD under the tree and he'd have no idea. "You see", she told me, "he used to have the tape but them tapes just don't last forever, ya know?". It took some doing but I found the CD the lady was looking for. The look on her face when I handed it to her was so very sobering. I think I may have helped make her Christmas. And I almost missed it.

We can never fully know how our decisions will affect other people in the world. At any given time you may be placed under inspection without even knowing it. Do you ever see someone simply 'do the right thing'? A child being pushed in a stroller unknowingly drops a glove and a stranger happens to see it, runs to scoop up the glove, and chases down the mother to return it. And when by some chance you watch it all play out, that simple act warms your heart to see kindness in the world. These are the kind of opportunities we have to spread God's love daily. We don't have to engage in grand gestures of Holiday spirit, we just need to get over the pitfalls waiting for us and simply be ready to do the right thing.
It's absolutely incredible how stressful this time of year can be. Increased traffic, packed parking lots, long lines, and pushy shoppers make it so very easy to get a person feeling more and more like a Grinch. I know it's hard. I know it's annoying. But please, just try with me. Try to rise above it and keep in mind why we decorate and why we celebrate.

"Hey, listen up friends. Good news is comin', soon is the end of all the worlds troubles and all of it's pain."
--The Rocket Summer

Tuesday, 21 December 2010

And It Was Just A Dream

I had a dream last night. This is what happened.

I was climbing an extremely tall set of stairs up the side of a mountain. Just in front of me, moving forward with every step I took, were paintings of things that most every person would desire: popularity, wealth, health, a family..all sorts of great and wonderful aspirations. With every step I was being told that as long as I kept climbing I would one day reach them, it was just a matter of getting there myself.

Higher and higher I climbed.

At one point I began to question the voice telling me that it was my own power that would gain me happiness. The more I questioned, the more miserable I became with the constant climbing; realizing it got me nowhere, gained me nothing. Finally, it became too much. I gave up and stopped my ascent. I broke down, cursed the voice that I was sure had been lying to me all along and cried out for help. Immediately the pictures fell to ash and blew away. The sight beyond them was one of the most frightening things I've seen. The staircase ended not 3 steps away from me. Beyond it: nothing. Well, something I suppose. I had rising high above a grey city. Dark and desolate, it sprawled out as far as the eye could see. The stairs seemed to be the only entrance but they didn't lead to it so much as they led one above it, you would fall in and never escape. It was as if the occupants of this city were to be trapped in desolation due to their blindness caused by believing a lie their whole life. I stared in horror and gripped the stone steps as hard as I could, paralyzed by fear. I could not continue, that much was certain. I could only lay there, begging to be saved.

Someone heard my cries.
Someone answered.

I don't know who did it, but I was picked up and began to be carried forward. Terrified that I would be drug to the edge and thrown in, I looked up. The stairs had been restored. They now passed well above the dark kingdom below and rose higher still. I was saved. Exhausted, I lowered my head and drifted into unconsciousness. It's impossible to determine how much time had passed but eventually I woke. Before me this time was a sight unlike anything I had ever seen. The lonely grey staircase was nowhere to be found. I was now at the entrance to a new valley. A beautiful and green valley. A paradise. As I entered, something became very clear, I was not alone. Suddenly surrounding me were all of my friends. Laughing, playing, encouraging me to come on in and join the fun. It was like an adult recess. My world had now been completely transformed. When once I had lived in darkness, loneliness and insecurity, I now found myself surrounded by color, love, fellowship and a seemingly eternal assurance that I would be cared for. Though I had spent my entire life struggling and fighting, when I had reached the end and given up on trying to do things myself, I had been carried away from my demise. I had finally come to know salvation.

Psalm 91:15
         He will call upon Me, and I will answer him;
         I will be with him in trouble;
         I will rescue him and honor him.

Thursday, 27 May 2010

...And Now For Something Completely Different.

As is typical, a great deal of time has passed since my last entry. And seeing as how I am in the habit of allotting more time than what is necessary to get the creative, blogging juices flowing, I find myself once again pressured to offer something of significance in the little bit of time we have together on here. I pondered long and hard for some life-altering anecdote or a revelation found through tedious soul searching but after all this time I can only offer a short story. But beware, this tale is so jam packed full of daring, shenanigans, and babes that those with a pre-existing heart condition may want to think twice before reading.

The following is the first of what could be thousands of accounts of the inspired and danger-filled life of a man known only as Mavid Diller. It is mysteriously titled: "The Luau"

Saturday.
A day for relaxing.
A day for napping.
A day...

for murder.

A lone figure stands..well..alone, his victim lay helpless at his feet, unaware of the fate that would surely soon play out. With ne'er a second thought, the man snuffed out his victims life with the tap of a foot.

The man: Mavid Diller
The victim: A spider.

Mavid Diller hates spiders. And his vow to extinguish all that dare cross his path is one that is kept vigilantly across many days. Days like today. The motive for such a brutal ending to another beings life? Fear. Yes, He fears them. But take note, no shame comes to Mavid Diller in stating that he fears only 2 things: Spiders, and the song 'What's New Pussycat' by Tom Jones.

**But I digress. This story is getting away from me. Ahem As I was saying...

...It was Saturday. The day of the Luau at work. A music store in the local mall had found themselves lucky enough to temporarily employ Mavid Diller as he continued his academic training for grander occupations. A memo had been circulating to explain that today would be a day to break the rules, let loose a bit. The dress code would temporarily expand to accept cargo shorts, crocs, and Hawaiian shirts. Unfortunately for Mavid, he no longer subscribed to the 'Idiot Tourist' fashion scene. Those days were behind him. So he suited up with the usual: black slip-on shoes, a work polo, and a pair of form-fitting skinny jeans that reveal much of the lower half of masculine perfection that makes up the physical structure that is Mavid Diller. Skinny jeans so tight they leave little to the imagination save for the mysteries only to be revealed by one lucky dame in a post-marital atmosphere of intimacy.

If there is one thing to be said about Diller's outfit it was that he was successfully, for lack of an actual word, un-Luau-ish.

He gave it no second thought and raced onward to work with only 12 minutes remaining until time for his shift.

In the 11 minutes that ensued, Mavid Diller foiled a bank robbery, extinguished a burning building with his urine, hit a puppy with his car, set the broken leg of the puppy with a piece of gum and his belt, got the puppy to the vet and won a cruise to Jamaica for two by answering a trivia question after being the 33 and 1/3 caller to his favorite radio station.

How many Oscars did Heath Ledger win and accept for his role as The Joker in Batman: The Dark Knight?

The answer was, of course: zero. Though he DID win, Heath was too busy being dead and buried to actually ACCEPT anything.

Jamaica would be a just reward for seeing through their trick question.

Two minutes remained as Mavid coolly strolled to the front gate of the store where he found employment. He would be, once again, fashionably on time. Or so it seemed.

She came out of nowhere. An angelic blur materialized into the most beautiful mall worker in existence. With long black hair pulled into a nerdy, bookish bun and a girlish laugh that was sure to hide the most sinister guilt. It could only be one girl: Polly Penthouse.

Struck with temporary retardation, Mavid Diller quickly recovered from his wordless stammering and turned on the charm and wit that had granted him the adoration of thousands of broads in the past. But today was different. For Polly wasn't having it. After gifting Mavid with a charitable 3 minutes of her time, with which he sputtered out salutations and heartfelt compliments, the woman of his dreams quickly made her exit while simultaneously making Mavid late for work.

Arriving exactly 1 minute late to work gained Mavid the attention of his supervisor who quickly noted that he was very, I venture to use the word again, un-luau-ish. He was then directed to the back room where costume jewelry and assorted pieces of Hawaiian decor awaited, poised to festoon him in preparation for the Luau that was taking place on the sales floor. Grabbing what few garments remained, Diller went to face his customers in a grass skirt and matching leis around his neck. With thoughts of asking any mildly attractive female if she would care to get 'leid' occupying his mind, he set out; knowing not that this infantile, split-second decision would soon affect him for the rest of his life.

TWO HOURS LATER

The question had been posed. To be 'leid' by a stranger, even a devilishly handsome one such as Mavid Diller, in a music store was met with outrage at such a blatant perversion, and then amusement after he revealed his true intent.

Cue the entrance of Peggy Penthouse.

After the butterflies in Mavids stomach ceased their rampage, Peggy was approached. With much concentration to stifle giggling, the proposition was made.

To Mavid Dillers amazement, Peggy smiled. But this small victory would soon be overshadowed. Literally.

The cloud of darkness that immediately fell over both Mavid and Peggy was, to say the least, sinister. Suddenly blocking much of the artificial light in the area was a man. Or perhaps a beast. The sheer size of it made it hard for one to determine. It spoke with a mans voice. A deep, angry, testosterone-infused voice.

"I didn't think your kind liked girls ya faggot", said the giant.

Oh God. Thought Mavid. This fool has mistaken my skirt and leis for an actual outfit.

He had. Having spotted Mavid upon entering the store, he had planned on giving Mavid plenty of space for fear of "catching it". "It", of course, being the homosexuality he considered to be a disease. A disease Mavid was thought to be stricken with. His attempt not to interact with Mavid was foiled upon the ire he felt in hearing the question posed to his girlfriend, Polly Penthouse.

Mavid had been picked up off his feet. He rose higher and higher into the air until the man was holding him, helpless as a rag doll, over his head.

"I think it's 'bout time to teach you a lesson boy."

WILL MAVID DILLER ESCAPE? OR WILL HE BE SMASHED TO POWDER BY THE GIANTS' MISGUIDED, APPALACHIAN ATTEMPT TO TEACH LESSONS? WILL POLLY EVER FALL FOR MAVID? AND WILL THE GIANT EVER STOP USING VIOLENCE TO COPE WITH HIS FEAR OF HOMOSEXUALITY, A FEAR BROUGHT ON BY CHILDHOOD SUMMER DAYS SPENT ALONE WITH HIS EXTRA-FRIENDLY UNCLE VICK?

FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON ANOTHER FIST-PUMPING, BLOOD PRESSURE-ELEVATING EPISODE OF.....

The Adventures of Mavid Diller!

Saturday, 03 April 2010

It's The Easter Blog, Charlie Brown!

Spring is upon us. And we find ourselves at the end of the fasting period known as Lent. This leads up to what most of us are more familiar with, Easter! But how many of us know the Easter story? There's a lot of corporate interference with our holidays so how can we know what's really at the heart of it? Well, that's why I'm here. To clear up those cloudy skies of Easter Facadery. My story begins....now.

Jesus had a pet. His pet, though we don't know it's name, was a bunny. A peculiar animal choice considering the climate in Israel but nonetheless, Jesus had a bunny. Now, this was no ordinary, run-of-the-mill, plain vanilla bunny. This bunny was different. Different for 2 reasons. 1) He was Jesus' bunny. So, of course, that adds a certain level of pizazz to the equation. But 2)....he could lay eggs. That's right folks. The rabbit of Christ, though still a mammal, refused to partake in the tradition of live birth. What's more, the eggs had no babies within them. They were colorful and contained candies and small prizes. Now an egg-laying mammal brings in to question whether or not he truly WAS a bunny and not, in fact, some sort of an impostor from the more commonly known egg-laying mammal, the Platypus. ANYWAY, Jesus and the bunny had a game they loved to play. Bunny would frolic around the Israeli desert and lay eggs and Jesus would hunt them in an attempt to gain the treasures within. (Something in me feels that considering the dull color scheme of a desert, that Jesus had very little trouble playing this game.) All was well. It was a perfect, happy friendship....until it happened. The bunny grew tired of this, the favorite game of Jesus, and he requested a change. He wanted to play Hide and Seek. Jesus seemed ok with the idea but was secretly upset. So he hid. And the bunny looked. And he looked. And he looked some more. For 3 days the bunny looked but Jesus was no where to be found. Finally, on the 3rd day, Jesus popped up out of a cave he'd been in. The bunny was filled with joy at the sight of his old friend but to his utter shock and dismay Jesus went up into the sky and didn't come back down. Racked with guilt and sadness at the loss of his dearest friend due to his own unwillingness to play the same game over and over, the bunny decided that from that day forth, he would go throughout the world on the anniversary of the day his friend disappeared and lay hidden eggs containing candies and prizes in hopes that one day. One year. His friend would return to find them.
THE END

Now, if anything from that story felt out of place to you, try reading the following verses.
Matthew: chapters 26, 27, and 28.

Mark: chapters 14, 15, and 16

Easter is the cornerstone of our Christian faith. It sets us apart from the rest of the worlds religions. We serve a RISEN and LIVING God. So even though it's fun to celebrate the holiday just remember why we do it.

**also, forgive the story, I'm just making a point, Happy Easter everyone.**